My photo
Athens, Ohio, United States
"Art and love are the same thing. It's the process of seeing yourself in things that are not you."

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

History of Gays in the U.S Military

1776 - 1993 - There is not a single homosexual in the United States military. Not one. Not even Ulysses S. Grant's beard.

1994 - "Don't ask, don't tell" is passed into law and there are now homosexuals being killed for their country...they just can't tell you that they kiss boys.

September 21, 2010 - The United States Senate decides that they still don't want to ask and they don't want to be told.

December 11, 2014 - Congress passes a bill into law that it's okay to have at least one of but not limited to the following George Michael albums in army barracks: Faith, Listen Without Prejudice Volume 1, Songs from the Last Century, Twenty Five.

February 4, 2015 - Congress declares that if two female soldiers kiss then it is okay to both ask and tell.

April 19, 2018 - The army updates its policy that two consenting soldiers can engage in homosexual acts, as long as a commanding officer witnesses the event and all three sign a waiver afterwords that what occurred was "totally not gay."

October 1, 2018 - Don't Ask, Don't Tell is repealed - effective for the Navy only.

August 31, 2096 - Don't Ask, Don't Tell is repealed - effective for all other branches.

November 6, 2096 - Republicans take back office. Don't Ask, Don't Tell is put back into effect.

March 29, 3019 - The United States of America is wiped out by expected.

No comments: