Go ahead, chew that over, you know I'm right. If William Shakespeare, Jackson Pollack or Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart were around today they would drop their respective quill/brush/baby grand piano and head out to a studio lot to start producing the real art. The time has now come where you don't need to even leave the house or quality entertainment or stimulating intellectual media. I for one, couldn't be happier and to show solidarity with the finest art form we have going right now, I am going to publish a Preview for the Primetime Emmy Awards, airing this Sunday. Pretty straight-forward: just a list of nominees in important categories, my picks and my commentary. Sit back, pop a TV dinner in the microwave and enjoy!
Outstanding Comedy Series
Curb Your Enthusiasm
Two and a Half Men
The Pick: The Emmys have already told us that 30 Rock has this award in a stranglehold. Those 17 nominations seem to sending a pretty strong message. I would be very happy with either 30 Rock or Entourage, The Office or Curb Your Enthusiasm would be okay and I will light myself on fire if Two and a Half Men wins
Outstanding Drama Series
The Pick: Boo to the Academy for listing Boston Legal and House under the Drama category! Anyone who has seen either of those shows can clearly tell you that they are NOT, in fact, dramas. Emmy will be attracted to the new shiny object of the bunch in Mad Men and having never seen the show, I can offer no commentary only to say that what I have seen does look excellent. But regardless, I am hard pressed to believe that any show could ever be better than Lost. It took a hell of a season for the Emmys to even nominate this once-in-a-lifetime show again (God knows why) and it deserves to win, just as it has every season of its existence. Oh and another side note: Dexter rocks.
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
Alec Baldwin- 30 Rock
Lee Pace- Pushing Daisies
Steve Carrell- The Office
Charlie Sheen- Two and a Half Men
The Pick- Please don't let Tony Shaloub win AGAIN. He is pretty funny and all but is it really necessary to give him the award every year. Oh well, at least he isn't Charlie Sheen. I am ambivalent toward Steve Carrell and Lee Pace, but one man I am not ambivalent toward is Alec Baldwin. Alec Baldwin has now taken the torch away from Will Arnett from Arrested Development as FUNNIEST MAN ON TELEVISION. Anyone who doesn't laugh til they pee watching the scene in 30 Rock where Jack Donaghy helps Tracey Jordan reconcile his daddy issues in therapy is someone I don't care to meet. So of course, Tony Shaloub will inevitably win his 598,272,092nd Emmy this year.
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
James Spader- Boston Legal
Bryan Cranston- Breaking Bad
Michael C. Hall- Dexter
Hugh Laurie- House
Gabriel Byrne- In Treatment
Jon Hamm- Dom Draper
The Pick: The Academy will pick Hugh Laurie and it is hard to argue with their logic. He is the only thing that makes an entire show not only watchable, but pretty excellent. It is no small feat, especially for a man acting in a foreign accent for five years. Plus, he gives great acceptance speeches. I myself, will be campaigning hard for Michael C. Hall. He literally gives me goosebumps as forensics expert by day-serial killer by night, Dexter Morgan. Bryan Cranston was robbed in his Malcolm in the Middle years and is now even better on Breaking Bad. Jon Hamm is an interesting dark horse, Gabriel Byrne has no chance and I pray to God that the Emmys give James Spader the shaft but he can never be counted out
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
Tina Fey- 30 Rock
Christina Applegate- Samantha Who?
Julia Louis-Dreyfuss- The New Adventures of Old Christine
America Fererra- Ugly Betty
Mary Louise Parker- Weeds
The Pick: What a difference a year makes. A category that was once the weakest is now, without a doubt, the strongest. I do not think there is a person who I can safely count out on this list. My gut tells me Louis-Dreyfuss won't win, simply because she did last year and the Emmys want to stay fresh. I think they go with Fey and I will certainly raise no objection. It is hard work playing the straight-person to an entire cast of loons and she does it as well as anyone. America Fererra would be a good dark horse candidate.
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
Sally Field- Brothers and Sisters
Glenn Close- Damages
Mariska Hartigay- Law and Order SVU
Holly Hunter- Saving Grace
Kyra Sedgwick- The Closer
The Pick: Booooooring. This list is just a who's who of women that the Emmys are fond of. Sally Field will win because I believe every Emmy voter secretly loves Brothers and Sisters and she is the only one on the list not playing the prototypical "tough chick". Not an awful choice but I think I would prefer Hartigay seeing as her show is the only one I ever really watch. Sedgwick has a shot as well.
Now here are my picks for (most of) the rest:
Outstanding Direction of a Comedy Series: The Office- Good Buy Toby
Should be: Entourage- No Cannes Do
Outstanding Direction of a Drama Series: Mad Men- Smoke Gets in Your Eyes
Should be: Mad Men- Smoke Gets in Your Eyes
Outstanding Reality or Competition Program: The Amazing Race
Should be: Project Runway
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series: Neil Patrick Harris- How I Met Your Mother
Should be: Kevin Dillon- Entourage
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series: Kristin Chenowith- Pushing Daisies
Should be: Kristin Chenowith- Pushing Daisies
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series: John Slattery- Mad Men
Should be: Michael Emerson- Lost
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series: Sandrah Oh- Grey's Anatomy
Should be: Chandra Wilson- Grey's Anatomy
Outstanding Variety, Music or Comedy Series: Saturday Night Live
Should Be: The Colbert Report
Well, there you have it, be sure to come back Monday morning when I am contrite about how wrong I was.